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+--- Thread: Random Chitchat 2012-2016 (/thread-434.html)
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RE: What we're doing - NiLSPACE - 12-31-2014
Oh god I'm really sorry for you
RE: What we're doing - tonibm19 - 01-01-2015
That's not good
.Did she say a reason?
Anyway, this is not the end. Hopefully this 2015 you will have a happy year and you will recover from this.
RE: What we're doing - xoft - 01-01-2015
She listed several reasons. I did not support her - everytime she wanted to talk to me, I just sat by the computer. Whenever she did something bad, I would punish her by not talking to her. Whenever I did something bad, she would try to talk to me and I would punish her by not talking to her. I did not help her with anything, she had to prepare the whole wedding by herself (and she almost called off the whole thing because of that). I would call her "painted" when she put her makeup on, in front of her colleagues, shaming her.
I know life is not easy with me, I feel guilty of most of these. But then, I have to defend myself. Since she started working, she did not have time for me at all. Whenever I wanted to do an activity, she would be still working, or was too tired to actually do anything. I do most of the house work - cleaning, cooking, washing, ironing - and she would just take it for granted without a single thank-you. When we finally got to go dancing, she would only complain about how bad I am and how I break her back. Nothing I did was ever appreciated. No wonder I got tired of this and started ignoring her in favor of the computer. And when we got home from the honeymoon (which was a disaster on its own, she took her parents and their friends with us) she would immediately go to a company event, got drunk and instead of calling me to come pick her up, she decided to sleep over at her boss' flat. And she wonders why I was furious afterwards. Whenever we quarreled, I was the one to come back with an apology, and she would just ignore me. This even happened during this Christmas, I tried three times to make up with her, but she was playing an ice queen, even avoiding me. I lost my nerve that day and went to my parents'; and that was the final nail in the coffin.
She says the love is gone. Maybe on her side, but I still love her deeply. Why oh why didn't I see the signs earlier and do something about it?
RE: What we're doing - wudles - 01-01-2015
(12-31-2014, 11:17 PM)xoft Wrote: She said she made her mind, she wants a divorce, she won't go to marital advice, and she gave me two weeks to vacate the flat.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I've only just caught up on aspects of this thread.
Perhaps this will give you both some time to re-assess. Marriage is hard work, and both parties have to want to make it work. I would talk to your parents and her parents to see what might be going on that you don't see. This would also give you a chance to express your position to someone who could explain it to her. In all likelyhood, she would not listen if it came from you -- but would listen to her parents.
Regardless, I'm sorry for your pain.
RE: What we're doing - tonibm19 - 01-01-2015
So, NiLSPACE, where does your username come from?
RE: What we're doing - NiLSPACE - 01-02-2015
If you give a variable a nil value (in Lua) it wil use no space in the memory, so I thought NiLSPACE was pretty fun
RE: What we're doing - xoft - 01-03-2015
Ever read any of the Terry Pratchett books regarding the Unseen University Library? They have an L-space there (mostly a gate through space and time available at magical libraries), that might be another cool reference
RE: What we're doing - NiLSPACE - 01-03-2015
I also thought you could see it as "Niels' pace"
RE: What we're doing - xoft - 01-03-2015
So many interpretations. Still, I'll miss STR...
RE: What we're doing - tonibm19 - 01-03-2015
Me too